“If I lost control would it be so wrong. To feel free and move along...”
Sorry it has been a month since my last blog post. We have been gearing up for a busy fall in the studio and I have been taking the time to focus on some much needed me time while the family is at school during the day. for the past three months, I have given myself this challenge to release a single every month for a year and I can say that it has really been a freeing experience. I have had a lot of people give great feedback and most of the positive feedback has been about the lyrics themselves, which has come as a shock to me because I really do not consider myself to be a good lyricist.
Aside from the creative part of my business, I have decided to get a much needed financial coach to not only get my personal finances in order, but my business finances in check as well. I never really went into owning a recording studio with a business mindset; most people who go into this business don’t either I am finding out. So, I feel like great, I am finally being the adult that I was claiming to be instead of procrastinated like I have been for six years. I had gotten myself in a great routine and then suddenly…a car accident!
I had just dropped off my daughter Annabelle at VPK. On to the next stop, drop off my other daughter Amelia at her school. We always go the same route and enjoy the view of downtown Lakeland from Lake Morton. I was about to turn up Massachusetts and a car went through the top sign and hit me on the left driver side. The force of the hit wasn’t enough to deploy the airbags, but all I could think about was, “Not today!!!” The car wasn’t totaled but wasn’t drivable though I was able to at least get it off to the side and park. The person who hit me was an elderly man, but if I am being honest, I was so mad at the fact that I got hit and my daughter was in the car with me. Thankfully, everyone involved, the person at fault, the police, the insurance person, and even me, were all respectful and helpful in this situation.
There was something I couldn’t shake however. Amidst being completely frazzled and more worried about my daughter and the fact that the only car we own at the moment is wrecked, I began to realize that I was in a lot of pain on my left side. it started out kind of nagging but then, probably from the look on my face, it started to intensify. Honestly, this post is not about my prognosis because I have to wait to get an MRI and upon looking at my X-rays, I have an over-compressed disc and a possible stress fracture in my lumbar area. It also didn’t help that upon learning this, I decided to Google all of this, which I TOTALLY REGRET!!!!
I felt scared…angry…I felt like somebody took something from me. Most of all, I felt alone. Even the myriad of people that saw me in my situation and pulled over to see if we were ok; I felt alone. My mother is in Boston visiting my sister and my wife was at school and I didn’t even know what to do when I pulled up to urgent car. Thankfully, my wife took off the next day to help with things and my mother and sister have been in constant communication with me. One of the things that my sister pointed out that your back is where most of your stress lies. I carry a lot of stress. I am a business owner who runs a very creative and niche business. I am a father and a husband. I am the financial planner (Not a good one either, lol).
My takeaway from all of this is that, I am no good for anyone if I am not good for me. I am not sure what the MRI is going to reveal or what is ahead for me, but I know that I need to take care of myself so that I can continue to take care of someone else. I thought I would feel like, “Geez, that is really selfish of you…” but before that moment, I was pretty much go go go. I was burning the candles at both ends and that is never a good thing. So do yourself a favor and take care of yourself. PEACE!
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